I often find myself comparing myself to other people in a way that is very unhealthy.
I compare my face, my skin, my clothes, even my personality.
The hardest thing to do is to just relax and let go of feelings or thoughts that you have gathered up about yourself. I’ll often have these moments of relief, where I’ll look at myself and what I’m doing in my life and just say yeah I’ve got this.
But most of the time, I’ll just think and think about what I should be doing instead of actually doing. I’ll get so caught up in what I should be doing that I’ll think about it for too long, and start planning every little detail in my head—until, it burns out.
It’s hard to just really grab a hold of myself and say you can do this, even if it won’t be perfect, even if it won’t grab people’s attention, even if the end result wasn’t the expected result or even close to that.
I try to watch interviews or essays about people who are going through self-affliction in their own way. And it just helps to relate and connect with another person, especially one whom I admire deeply.
There’s a key difference between planning what you want and burning yourself out over it, and planning what you want while just letting it happen without a concrete plan.
I think in a lot of ways I tend to stress myself out more than I need to which gathers up a lot of anxiety and sadness.
While learning more and more about myself, I began to understand what works and what doesn’t work for me and how I should plan my happiness rather than my work for my happiness.